Bethjoy.com

Right now I think I’ll try to write a short story and see if I can make it slightly funny. It will take place in or near Fange since I want most of my stories to take place in that place from now on. Fange is a very large capitol city, I haven’t named the whole country yet, but it is all underneath Fange and its kings. So with that intro here I go…

Once upon a clock, a long clock ago there was a very famous clock in the royal museum in Fange. This clock was famous for several reasons, though when you saw it you might wonder why it was so famous. There was nothing really remarkable about it, other than the fact that it was broken from, apparently being shoved very hard onto something round. It no longer kept any sort of time but there was a very interesting tale about it which tour guides attempted to bore visitors with. However despite their best efforts the tale did not always bore the tourists because it was extremely interesting when it happened and without much further ado I shall pretend to be a more interesting tour guide than most and attempt to tell it to you with all of the interruptions from whatever tourists are around.

“It all began a long time ago when there lived a certain clock maker named John Smith.”
“John Smith?” interrupted Tourist One who twirled a black mustache, “Why that is my name!”
“It’s my name too.” said Tourist Five from beneath the brim of his cowboy hat, “Where there as many John Smith’s back then as there are now?”
” No,” Said the Tour Guide, “Back in those days there weren’t as many John Smith’s as there are now but when somebody is even remotely famous, people will name their children after them. However at the time he was the only John Smith in his town. It was rather a small town and hardly needed a clock maker so he did other jobs than just making and repairing clocks.”
“Like what?” interrupted Tourist Two as he fanned his face with his baseball cap.
“Like helping bring in crops in harvest and helping the Lord of the Nearby Castle(Nearby Castle was actually the castle’s name) whenever he needed help for something, which was quite often for the Lord of the Nearby Castle was an adventurous sort of fellow and should have guessed that it would rub off on his only child. Of course if his child had been a boy that would have been just fine but he had a daughter.”
“IS this going to be one of those ridiculous stories where a girl wants to be a knight and have adventures etc.?” interrupted Tourist Two as he put his hat back on his head.
“No, not really. Though Rose does play an important part in the story, it is mainly in the fact that John Smith fell in love with her.”
“Oh, I do hope that this will be a romantic story!” said Tourist Three, a female teenager with blonde hair.
“And I hope it won’t” said Tourist Two. Tourist Three was about to argue the point but the Tour Guide continued hurriedly,
“Actually the story is both romantic and unromantic enough to suit anybody. Now to continue. John Smith had just finished building the clock that you see in front of you,”
“I’m looking the other way, is it still in front of me?” asked Tourist Four, a eighteen year old boy in a black jacket with a red Ferrari emblem on it.
“Um,” said the tour guide, “I suppose not. But to continue, John Smith had just finished that clock which he was going to deliver to the Lord of the Nearby Castle when news came that Vade Dath(A distant relation of the McDath’s who where in a different story) or Lord Dath as he preferred to be called had just decided to begin the take over of Fange.”
“Ug, I hope this won’t be an evil villain trying to take over the world story.” said Tourist Two, who did not seem very easy to please, in fact his baseball cap said on it, “Picky” but that might have been his name.
“Well, Vade Dath never does take over the world.” said the Tour Guide
“You know,” put in Tourist Four facing the Tour Guide, “If you added R’s in the right places and switched the order a bit Vade Dath becomes Darth Vader.”
“Yes, it does, but this story will take forever to tell at this rate so please save your questions for the end of the tour.”
“Yes,” said Tourist Six in very loud voice, “You should all be quiet like I am, can’t you hear how quiet I am?”
“To continue” said the Tour Guide as several of the other tourist told Tourist Six to be quiet, “The news that Vade Dath had begun the conquest of Fange, and that he was beginning it rather near the place where Nearby Castle was, had just reached John Smith as he was setting out to deliver the clock to the Lord of Nearby Castle. So he rode with the messenger to Nearby Castle to see his reaction when the message was delivered. Also, since he was rather short on money at the moment, he wanted to collect his fee for the clock. However when the Lord of the Nearby Castle heard the news about Vade Dath he forgot all about clocks and even several broad hints from John Smith were not enough to remind him of his duty. Well, just as they were all discussing what to do about Vade Dath he suddenly walked into the room.”
“This is soooooexciting!!!” said Tourist Three with a shake of her blonde hair.
“Every one was surprised to see Vade Dath” continued the Tour Guide ignoring her comment, “But he just smiled an evil smile and said ‘Since I have decided to take over Fange I have decided to begin with Nearby Castle!’ He raised his sword and was about to strike down the Lord of the Nearby Castle when…”
“Could you tell me where the gift shop is?” asked Tourist Seven who was passing by and was quite unaware of the reason why several other tourists started glaring at him. He had a passing resemblance to Buster Keaton in more ways than one.
“Head straight down this hall and turn…” began the tour guide.
“WHAT HAPPENED NEXT???” Tourist Three interrupted, almost screaming at the top of her lungs.
“If you would just wait one moment,” the tour guide said to Tourist Seven who said that he could, “Well, just as Vade Dath was about to strike him down, John Smith rushed to his aid and smashed his newly completed clock down on Vade Dath’s head and that ended another attempt at taking over Fange. The clock was then taken to this museum where John Smith was paid in full and he later married Rose and lived happily ever after. Now to get to the gift shop…”
After the tour guide had left Tourist Four happened to look into his booklet on the attractions of that particular part of the museum and seeing the picture of the clock looked at it. However when he read the description underneath it said “antique clock from the reign of King Larnd. It was damaged when his favorite dog knocked it off the table and stepped on it.” he was rather surprised. And I don’t blame him.
MORAL: Do not believe everything that tour guides tell you and beware of dogs.

I hope you enjoyed that:)