I had a delightful time at the Massatts. I got to see several hypercard games. I got to make an extremely humorous random story that I will probably post at the end of this. I received a beautiful paper mache sword and shield, both beautifully painted. I got to see a fencing demonstration. I got to play hangman. I received complements on my writing. I got to read several stories written by the Massatts. I got to meet Sarah Massatt’s brothers and that was very pleasant too. I’m in the car right now having just left their house and my battery looks as though it is going to go out in a short while so I think I will need to close this post soon. Here is the Random Story that I and the Massatt siblings concocted. I did the code and typing and supplied many of the ideas and the Massatt’s provided the rest of the ideas. The Massatt boy’s names are Josh, Daniel, and David and there was great hilarity whenever one of their names showed up.
pickOne = function(listOfThings){
randomNumber = Math.floor(Math.random()*listOfThings.length)
return listOfThings[randomNumber]
}
openings = new Array(”Once upon a time”, “One day at the Massatt’s House”, “On the planet Hoth”, “Once on a medieval planet”, “One day”, “Now though most people may think this is nonsense”, “Two point five miles from the North of Crete”, “Once several people, including me, sat down to write a random story. This is what happened. So without further ado, Once upon a time”, “In the Grand Canyon”, “A long time ago in the galaxy far far away were only interesting things happen”, “A long time ago, about last Thursday”, “One day”)
opening = pickOne(openings)
adjs1 = new Array(”hungry”, “loud”, “thirsty”, “stupid”, “brainless”, “incredibly intelligent”, “handsome”, “boring”, “shoeless”, “super fast”, “incredible”, “hungry”, “starving”, “super full”, “starry eyed”, “idiotic”, “bachelor”, “pepsi drinking”, “lucky”, “yucky”, “ugly”, “moronic”, “happy”)
adj1 = pickOne(adjs1)
heroes = new Array(”prince”, “lord”, “hero”, “magazine seller”, “swordsman”, “skateboard man”, “thinker”, “actor”, “monk”, “couch potato”, “old man”, “popcorn eater”, “foot print maker”, “movie watcher”, “film editor”, “clue champion”, “moron”, “king”, “ranger”, “archer”, “ex-hero”, “teacher”)
hero = pickOne(heroes)
names = new Array(”Luke Skywalker”, “Josh”, “Daniel”, “David”, “Samwise Gamgee the Brave”, “Harry Potter”, “Colonel Mustard”, “Aragorn”, “Jabba the Hut”, “Voldemort”, “Gandalf”, “Cheddar the Cheese Eater”, “Han Solo”, “King Lear”, “Hamlet”, “Romeo”, “Andrew”, “John”, “Charmont”, “Harvey”, “Sparky”, “Pomp Collins”, “Iamoff Myrocker”, “George Washington”, “Abraham Lincoln”, “Adolph Hitler”, “Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater”, “Yoda”, “Peter Pan”)
name = pickOne(names)
hobbies = new Array(”eating Pizza”, “burning whatever he was trying to cook”, “jumping off cliffs onto sponges soaked in orange juice”, “eating ice cream by the gallon”, “changing light bulbs”, “deep sea diving without masks”, “being silent for a year in order to better understand the sound of a whisper”, “selling get thin magazines to people that look like they were in need”, “watching television”, “laying down on his back all day”, “playing clue”, “punching holes in wallpaper”, “harnessing evil”, “eating lots of chocolate”, “consuming large amount of, gasp, carbs”)
hobbie = pickOne(hobbies)
adjs2 = new Array(”dangerous”, “funny”, “active”, “unimportant”, “incredible”, “dumb”, “boring”, “ugly”, “unexciting”, “intellectual”, “morbid”, “fantastic”, “worthless”, “morbid”, “childish”, “intense”)
adj2 = pickOne(adjs2)
adjs3 = new Array(”boring”, “wonderful”, “captivating”, “ingenious”, “tasty”, “tasteful”, “funny”, “delightful”, “romantic”, “dangerous”, “prudent”, “pleasant”, “depressing”, “fattening”)
adj3 = pickOne(adjs3)
nouns1 = new Array(”career”, “hobby”, “waste of time”, “job”, “something to do”, “sport”, “collage course”)
noun1 = pickOne(nouns1)
events1 = new Array(”heard that dragons were attacking in the eastern marches”, “felt full”, “forgot who he was”, “learned that a beautiful princess turned eighteen”, “gave orders to save a flower from wilting”, “found himself in love”, “lost his money”, “ate twelve bowls of cereal for breakfast and felt as though he’d like eight more but couldn’t eat it because he was out of cereal”)
event1 = pickOne(events1)
events2 = new Array(”do something about it”, “eat several gallons of ice cream”, “go on a diet”, “get married”, “think about it”, “eat twelve pizzas”, “photograph the event”, “ignore it completely”, “go look at fast cars”, “go shopping”, “ponder the matter while eating beans”, “drink eighteen gallons of orange juice in order to try and explode”)
event2 = pickOne(events2)
adjs4 = new Array(”tired”, “happy”, “invisible”, “hungry”, “hopeful”, “talking”, “active”, “ugly”, “brown”, “shaggy”, “pink and purple polka dotted”, “gleaming”, “grey”, “pink”, “tiny”)
adj4 = pickOne(adjs4)
animals = new Array(”dog”, “horse”, “dragon”, “Porsche”, “pony”, “bicycle”, “tricycle”, “wheel chair”, “car”, “alligator”, “wiener dog”, ” huge unusual barbecue grill”, “green alien horse like creature”, “elephant”, “stallion”)
animal = pickOne(animals)
actions1 = new Array(”slid under”, “jumped on”, “fell off of but then got back on”, “mounted”, “crashed into”, “forgot about”, “fed his”, “fixed”, “sold”, “painted bright pink”, “shoved into a mud puddle”, “took to the zoo”, “remembered”)
action = pickOne(actions1)
actions2 = new Array(”rode off into the sunset”, “went to the nearest Walmart”, “ate six cakes to quench his great appetite”, “laughed carelessly”, “thought this sufficient omen to write his memoirs”, “he decided to sit at home and watch TV”, “had a flashback of his heroic past, which wasn’t actually very heroic”, “recognized the connection between this and his heroic past”, “jumped up and down while shouting loudly”, “kicked a wall”, “reloaded his pistol”, “lost a game of clue to the elusive Miss Scarlet”, “ate lunch”)
action2 = pickOne(actions2)
actions3 = new Array(”wrote a sonnet”, “bought a fancy dinner at a restaurant”, “ate thirteen pizzas and decided to eat a fourteenth so he wouldn’t have bad luck”, “ran around town sampling ice cream”, “wrote a novel”, “put together a two thousand piece puzzle”, “ate three egg rolls”, “made loud noises”, “sang at the top of his lungs”, “sat around and watched TV”, “Wrote a three thousand page book on Pizza, it’s varieties and how to eat it. Surprisingly it turned out to be a best seller”)
action3 = pickOne(actions3)
adjs5 = new Array(”beautiful”, “queenly”, “fair”, “ugly”, “happy”, “inteligent”, “blonde”, “fat”, “brunette”, “hungry”, “pizza eating”, “ravishingly lovely”)
adj5 = pickOne(adjs5)
loves = new Array(”Dutchess of Morder”, “banker’s daughter”, “next door nieghbor”, “princess of the realm”, “knight’s daughter”, “owner of the ice cream shop”, “winner of the lottery”, “waitress at a pizza place”, “studier of ancient literature such as the works of Tolkien”, “female professional basketball player”, “Queen”, “countess”)
love = pickOne(loves)
adjs6 = new Array(”bulbous”, “cute”, “fragile”, “biting”, “talking”, “bulging”, “hungry”, “fat”, “lazy”, “sleepy”, “noisy”, “slobbery”, “Tv oriented”, “hyper”, “freaky”, “pampered”, “paper thin”)
adj6 = pickOne(adjs6)
pets = new Array(”kitten”, “warthog”, “puppy”, “spider”, “bat”, “hippopotamus”, “goldfish that was able to breath in water”, “dragon”, “jelly doughnut”, “rabbit”, “Guinea pig”, “Siamese cat”, “lion cub”, “mouse”, “television”)
pet = pickOne(pets)
reasons = new Array(”snored”, “was blind”, “was undeserving of his attention”, “could spit farther than he could”, “was an uncomfortable parallel to his own life”, “was too fat”, “took too much of his love’s attention”, “ate more than he did”, “used him for a chew toy”, “followed him every where”, “wobbled around”, “waddled all over the place”, “could eat more pizza, and faster, than he could”, “it wasn’t house broken”, “tracked mud all over the house”, “made a lot of noise”, “was always hungry”, “once stepped on his foot”)
reason = pickOne(reasons)
adjs11 = new Array(”slimy”, “villainous”, “hungry”, “active”, “kidnapping”, “greenish”, “dark”, “evil”, “square faced”, “prune eating”, “hungry”)
adj11 = pickOne(adjs11)
villains = new Array(”villain”, “giant spider”, “evil dark lord named Darth Vadar”, “knight”, “dark jedi”, “burglar, though not hobbit like”, “tiny dragon”, “television salesman”, “blob of green goo”, “photographer”, “obsessive maniac”, “Kleenex destroying robot”, “Zoo manager”, “bear”, “vulture in sheep’s clothing”)
villain = pickOne(villains)
reasons2 = new Array(”had a high retail value”, “reminded him of himself when he was young”, “would make him famous”, ” looked nice and he wanted to take pictures of it”, “smelled of vinegar”, “made nice stew”, “was something to keep him from being lonely”, “liked the way he looked”, “would be able to eat his table scraps”, “smelled of rose leaves”, “would taste wonderful on pizza”, ” might bring a high ransom”, “might take like chicken”, “would give the right atmosphere to his dank smelly cave”)
reason2 = pickOne(reasons2)
adjs12 = new Array(”many tiresome”, “uneventful”, “dreary”, “boring”, “two short”, “no”, “pleasant”, “scary”, “romantic NOT”, “tiresome”, “clever”, “hunger inspiring”, “many of his brothers adventures”, “lots of other person’s adventures”, “many trading”, “simple”, “time consuming”, “simple”, “comfortable”, “money making”, “blitzkrieg”)
adj12 = pickOne(adjs12)
enddes = new Array(”happily”, “moodily”, “uneventfully”, “hopefully”, “laughingly”, “sulkily”, “adventurously”, “romantically”, “expensively”, “modestly”, “pratically”, “on the couch in front of the TV”, “in a palace”, “in front of the TV”, “with a pleasant mixture of joys and pleasures”, “dumpily”, “with lots of eating”, “for a long while though not quite”)
end = pickOne(enddes)
document.write(opening) there was a document.write(adj1)
document.write(hero) named
document.write(name) who enjoyed document.write(hobbie). Despite the fact that some might think this a document.write(adj2) hobby he thought it quite a document.write(adj3) document.write(noun1). One day he document.write(event1) so he decided to document.write(event2). Quickly he document.write(action) his document.write(adj4) document.write(animal) and document.write(action2). However, I doubt this helped much. Then he document.write(action3). After this he met his true love, the document.write(adj5) document.write(love). Next document.write(name) met her document.write(adj6) pet document.write(pet) which he didn’t like because it document.write(reason). However he quickly had to overcome his dislike of the document.write(adj6) pet document.write(pet) because a document.write(adj11) document.write(villain) kidnapped it since it document.write(reason2) so document.write(name) had to go and rescue it! So after document.write(adj12) adventures he was able to obtain the document.write(adj6) pet document.write(pet) and he brought it back to the document.write(adj5) document.write(love) who immediately fell in love with him and they got married and lived document.write(end) ever after.